This is the stuff.. that comes from broken hearts and broken dreams...
People always ask me why I'm so happy, how I can be so cheerful.. this doesn't seem like a post about joy or happiness at first.. so make sure you read the whole thing ;)
"For without pain there can be no pleasure, without sadness there can be no happiness. Without misery there can be no beauty. And without these, life is endless, hopeless, doomed and damned.”
― Harlan Ellison
~Walls~
walls in place
firmly laced
with lies, regrets and wishes
there to deflect
didn't want you to connect
just trying to protect
my heart
with a slow, taunting seep
stealthy emotions ran deep
I never intended to let you in
in my silly little daze
love was all I craved
had myself believing that you might actually need me
conceited, I know
someday I'll muster the strength to let you go
with these ever changing conditions
and your ever changing mind
frequently inquiring
the truth is hard to find
patience is not my state
can't persuade the hands of fate
maybe for love
it is too late
walls in place
firmly laced
with lies, regrets and wishes
-SaraKate
~Ambivalence~
I sit and ponder
the contradictions of my mind
perplexed, truly quite puzzled
was it truth that you shared with me?
was everything riddled with lies?
memories quickly flicker
like an old movie reel
can't even begin to express the way it feels
some images are welcome
others get shoved aside
forgot to buckle my seat belt
on this roller coaster ride
sweet, little memories
drift slowly by
the comforting warmth of your fingers
laced through mine
new memories come
not so sweet
reminding of times
I never wish to repeat
hot, salty tears
quickly streaming down
pail, fragile cheeks
times when your silence
was with me for weeks
some memories
harder to classify
thick tangle of emotions
I resist the urge to sigh
across the room connection
your crystal blue eyes
almost impossible to despise
my heart falters
skipping beats
some days I miss you
some days not at all
guess it doesn't matter
I should just forget about it all
no reason to live in the past
this I definitely know
for some reason or another
my heart refuses to let you go
are you Prince Charming?
is there someone else?
my excitement is building
for whoever you shall be
the moment you sweep me off my feet
I will conquer this ambivalence in me
-SaraKate
~Broken & Beautiful~
they told me
they warned me
they judged me
they scorned me
I heard
I denied
I loved
I cried
he knew
he played
he wooed
he lied
I'm broken
I'm bruised
I'm damaged
I'm used
HE's forgiving
HE's redeeming
HE's loving
HE's healing
-SaraKate
*HE= Jesus Christ, Emmanuel, The Bread of Life!
Psalm 34:18 (HCSB)
18 The Lord is near the brokenhearted;
He saves those crushed in spirit.
Sincerely,
-Your broken, healing, loved and kneeling SaraKate <3